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Last Tuesday night was a full circle moment for me when over 70 people decided to attend a cocktail gathering I arrange at The Sorrento Hotel the last Tuesday of every month. The lounge was so full people were spilling into the lobby! There are those who were there when I started the gathering one year ago and have been diligent attendees, while others come and go, some bringing several friends. Over the months I have been advised in many ways. There seems to be the sense among well intentioned would be organizers that people need to be entertained, or need something to do. I've been told that they won't know what to talk about so I should choreograph the social activity. I've been told that people need to have things in common and share similar interests as well. The more advice I have received, the less I have wanted to deal with the whole thing. I have often considered letting it die out. To be perfectly honest, I'm not a connector. I am though, I true blue party girl. I like to put on stylish clothes and engage several people in conversation. I want to be entertained by characters and intellectuals. I want to flirt and be flirted with by- well, everyone. I like beautiful, sexy, weird, smart, ugly, cool, nerdy people alike. And while some people bond over hardship or a common enemy, I'd rather celebrate the good things. I'm a firm believer that what we pay attention to is what we create more of. I don't exactly want to indulge the crisis of the moment. In fact, don't call me if you're in a state of tragedy, I probably won't hear my phone ring over the loud crowd of the room I'm in. Unless of course you're one of my children, but that's a party unto itself. The thought that has kept me from quitting on the gathering is that I like the people that come and I want to see them. I want to go out, wear something pretty or cool, mingle, catch up and just be me with people I can explore on my own terms. So after being discouraged, I figured, there must be someone in Seattle who feels the same way I do. Right?

Right! Every month more people come. Artists, musicians, writers, business owners, foundation board members, stylists, executives, polo players, chefs, real estate agents, builders, designers, models, housewives, financial advisors, lawyers, doctors, professors and everyone in between can be found among the group. People of varying backgrounds and incomes, yet, they all seem to have plenty to talk about. Last night a whirlwind of cocktailers came up to me saying, "this is so much fun!" All day I've been asking myself, why is it so much fun? My guess is that the old world back drop lends a style that feels solid and unpretentious. Yet, we're all craving to feel urban and sophisticated without the pressure of a fundraiser or playing audience to something. Maybe simply drinking and getting a little silly,and  seeing people we don't otherwise cross paths with is good medicine in the current social climate. Someone tells you to dress up so you let go of feeling like a schlep because they don't give you the option. Then they tell you to be you. No really, be yourself. Oh and laugh, that's always a good one. The one thing I never do at a party is complain or talk about the current negative dramas in my life. I try to make sure and set a light hearted tone because the last thing I want is to commiserate or form bonds with people over some sense of crises. Yuck. Yes, that's just asking for a horrible time and inviting the friendship of people who enjoy having problems. Yuck again. On the flip side, I love to hear people's stories and love to tell mine. Yes, even the "bad" stuff. There's something about being real, open and even vulnerable that is the best gift we can give each other person to person. While complaning is burdensome, sharing is unifying.

For whatever reason people keep coming to The Sorrento on the last Tuesday of the month, I'm glad they do. I'm also gald I didn't quit because one or two "advice givers'. I love who comes. I love the banter, getting to meet new people and hearing and telling the stories of who we are. I imagine if my living room were big enough, this is how I'd want it to feel. I know there's a world where people hold it against each other for being too happy, too beautiful, too successful, too clever, or too different... but that's not my world. Whatever a person has going wrong, or isn't doing well, isn't worth attention. The same person will have just as many things going right, and a chance to elevate those traits is good for all of us. I tend to think we all have something that is unique to who we are that is worthwhile, even if it's to be very kind, or to have a contagious laugh. Those are the things that make us good for each other. I love that old hotel because it reminds me of a special person who taught me that life is one very short fabulous party and we're lucky enough to get an invite, the best thing we can do is SHOW UP.

XOXO,

~S